So hurt

How freaking messed up is this?

I mean, really? 

I’m so upset right now, and i don’t even know whom i’m speaking to, but really, would you upset if your father wants nothing to do with you?

And you didn’t do a single thing?

Just be alive, and try to be his pride and joy.



My father and mother got divorce over two years ago, and i tried to keep in contact with my father, but he flat out told me he disowned me, and he never, ever wanted to talk to me again. But now, i just want to speak with him, because he is still my father. I have moved on from that point in my life, but i just want him to know, i still acknowledge him, because when i have kids some day, i want them to know their grandfather. I hate this, and it just bugs the crap out of me.

I’m not trying to be rude to him or anything, it just really hurts that he doesn’t want to do anything with me. I really don’t understand it. It kinda sucks, because im trying to make him apart of my life, even if were just talking. I have a step-dad, who is just amazing to me, and my family. I am very grateful and love him very much. But, at the same time, my step-dad and my dad - they are apart of my life. One is actively in it, while the other isn’t.

I’m giving him world of chances for him to speak with me, before i really just cut him off, when he would need me. I really am truly, and completely totally hurt. All i have been listening to is Demi Lovato - World of chances. It’s killing me, but the song helps. I wasn’t the only one that went through this, and this song sets me at peace.

Whoever is reading this, just thank you. I would love some type of feedback.

Please and thank you.